The Fastest Year

 (photo courtesy of Tiffany Sheppard)

The day was August 24, 2010.  I got up early to go to Baylor Hospital in Grapevine, Texas for my scheduled induction.  It was about 7am or so and I was nervous.  I had had two babies before, and I knew what was in store, but it had been a few years.  I was confident that it would all come back to me.  I'll never forget getting situated in my room and my nurse, Mary, was entering in some information about me into her computer.  She asked me where I was born.  I said, "Funny you ask, because I was actually born in this hospital when it was the old one, before they built this new one."  "No way!" she said.  "Who delivered you, do you know?"  I told her the name of my mom's OB/GYN.  She knew the name and asked the phlobotomist who was starting up my I.V.  She knew him and had worked with him before years ago.  I immediately felt so comfortable then, so at-ease.  I was also so happy that I was in some experienced hands and they had a little bit of familiarity with me in some small way.  I was also so happy that my I.V. was put in my forearm and went in lickety split the first time, without any pain (I swear, for me that is the worst part!)

The day went a little slowly after that.  I was sure that it would be faster than Maddie's birth, which took about 8 hours from start to finish.  Jeff and I watched a few stand-up bits from Brian Regan and laughed.  The nurse kept checking me and said that the baby was still so high up.  I was getting concerned that it would take a long time.  I remember it was about 4pm and Oprah was on, and I progressed very quickly.  I felt the baby drop, and I was feeling the pressure.  In about 15 minutes, I was pushing.  I pushed for about 45 minutes, and Emma was born at 5:01.  My hospital room looked out onto the street that I grew up on as a young child, Bluebonnet Street.  What a full-circle moment, to remember riding my bike in the huge dirt mounds where they were building Baylor, and now, having my sweet baby there myself.

I remember a month or so before, at our family reunion in Oregon, my cousin Marianne asked me whether I  wanted a boy or a girl.  I told her that of course I would be happy with either, but I would feel bad if it were a girl because I didn't want her to be like a third wheel, because Camie and Maddie are 2 years apart and pretty close.  "Oh nonsense!" Marianne said.  "Those two girls would love that baby girl so much, she would be like their little doll.  It will all work out."  We didn't know it was going to be a girl.  It was a surprise, and I couldn't believe it was another girl, but on the other hand, I could since that's all my family has.  They gave her to me and I started to cry.  I love that first moment when a mother meets her baby for the first time.  It is such a sweet spiritual experience, like your souls are meeting again.  I knew instantly that she was mine, that she was supposed to be in our family, and everything would be all right. 

Jeff and I also don't name our babies until they're born.  I think you have to see them, and try on the names, to see what feels right and what fits.  I love that process, because it's so special.  I remember reading in my scriptures that morning and thinking about the name Jeff and I had talked about.  The nurse brought her into me shortly after that.  As I took her in my arms and said, "Are you Emma?"  I started to cry.  I knew that was supposed to be her name.

Marianne was right.  This little girl has brought such life and light to our home, such love, such ease and comfort.  She is the sweetest, most laid-back baby and this has been the fastest year ever.  I can't believe she is one.  Almost every day I tell her to stop growing, and she's not listening.   Maddie calls her "Little Sweetness."  I didn't want to put her to bed tonight because now she will just keep getting older after one.  And that is not acceptable.

Happy birthday Birthday Girl!  We love you!